Childless Pope Francis says not having children is selfish http://t.co/fDgsUMYKgS | disagree #childfree is selfLESS h/t @3wks
— Cat 5 (@theUcane) February 12, 2015
That’s me on Twitter. Here are just some of the many ways in which being a #childfree couple is selfLESS—and not selfish as the childless Pope claims:
- We are not adding to the 7-billion and growing number of humans on this planet. Earth is dying and humans are the cause. Those who have children/grands need to realize that their legacies might very well witness the end of this planet.
- Smaller house.
- Smaller/fewer cars.
- We are never too busy to recycle, even if we have to schlep over to the hazardous waste center once in a while.
- Less food consumed.
- Less trash produced. However many diapers a kid goes through….they aren’t in the landfills because of us.
We aren’t using gallons-upon-gallons of water to wash cloth reusables. - Speaking of water, it is a very precious resource, so we are conservative (and working on being even better). That’s easy to do with just two.
- We are sick less often, so we are less of a burden on any workforce for missed days of work.
- Since we are sick less often, the buck stops with us for the spreading of germs; we stay home. We have the sick time to do so because we didn’t use it up when our kids were sick.
- We never burden our friends with stories of pregnancy/labor/delivery or the horrifically gross and boring stories of potty training.
- We live smaller (not just the house/car but wholly) than parents. Less plastic (reusable snack and juice boxes, toys). Less consumables, in general. We use less batteries (and then we recycle the ones we do use at that hazardous waste center instead of being too busy and letting them go into the landfill).
- While we will take part in “parenting” our own parents, we will never put that burden on to someone else.
- We live within our means. Kids are expensive. If we had kids, we’d take on (lots of) debt. That is not responsible.
- We are not passing on any genetic traits/conditions to humanity’s future. Humanity doesn’t need my family lines of heart disease, diabetes, blood pressure, cholesterol, and even suicide.
- Because we aren’t burdened by the time commitment of children, we are better citizens of our world. We give time where our skills can be of use.
We don’t assume we are the be-all-and-end-all to humanity and “the future”. No, we aren’t spawning the next Charles Darwin, Albert Einstein, Steve Jobs, or Rosa Parks; no one in their right mind thinks we would. Our kid would not find the cure for cancer; our kid would like gaming, movies, and some music and spectator sports. In short, our kids would be couch potatoes. We also aren’t “giving” the world the next Jeffrey Dahmer, Adolf Hitler, George Zimmerman, or Casey Anthony. In fact, we aren’t even giving the universe more Es and Ls. You’re welcome, Earth, Milky Way, and beyond.
And here is the one that drives the point home, every time: Please describe why you think having kids is a good thing without using “I” or “want”. Not easy, is it?
The decision to have kids or not is purely personal. The Pope and other leaders need to stop chastising those who don’t have/want kids.
No wonder I stopped being religious/christian, nevermind Catholic. Hey Pope, the giant hat makes you look like an ass, but your condescending attitude makes you sound like one, too.
Just call me selfish.”@theUcane: #facepalm:Childless Pope Francis says not having children is selfish http:/http://t.co/GpLvYoKHMY#childfree
Its sad when you think of kids as a problem. It shows how selfish someone can be. God said to be fruitful so I plan to. Sorry you feel that way, I will pray for you.
Chad/mccartney96ag,
So it’s okay for you to insist that others have kids…
…but it’s not okay for us to make that decision for ourselves?
It’s okay for the pope to to insist that others have kids…
…eventhough he has none himself (that we know of)?
Hypocrisy.
Chad, you are not always correct. You can’t possibly know what is best for us….especially without any knowledge of or regard for our situations.
* Case in point #1: My mom is currently living with her abuser. I’m a fifth generation of only children. I am literally the only person in existence (other than my elderly grandmother) who can help, and I’m hours from them. How much less help do you think I could be if I were carting kids off to ballet, soccer, and doctor’s appointments? No one has unlimited time, space, money, emotions, and other resources.
* Case in point #2 on the blog that you apparently didn’t even fully read: “Humanity doesn’t need my family lines of heart disease, diabetes, [high] blood pressure, cholesterol, and even suicide.” Would you really advocate I share those family traits with the world? My dad was 55 when he suddenly dropped dead of a heart attack with no warning. I know what it’s like to lose multiple family members at young ages. I won’t do that to offspring.
Furthermore, these are very minor reasons why we don’t want kids. The list of major ones is long and includes some very serious issues.
Also from this very blog post: please list a reason for having children without using “I/we” or “want”. You can’t because it can’t be done. Having children is what the individual (“I”) wants to do. Therefore it is selfish. Not wanting something–in most cases, this one included–is the opposite of selfish.
When did you ponder/decide to have/not children? I bet you always wanted them, right? Well, I didn’t always; I went back and forth on the idea. Later, I did. And then I met E, and we did. We got married wanting three, but by the time we would have truly considered the commitment, we were both #childfree. Through separate/individual processes, we each decided we did not want to parent. We gave it a few years and still felt the same. Later, through the “miracle” of science he/I can’t/won’t.
It is selfLESS to be childfree for the reasons listed in our post and for many more. SelfISH would be having a child/ren you can’t care for. How many of the world’s children have you adopted or otherwise cared for other than your own? That would be a selfless act that would help the world.
It is selfISH to tell others what to think/feel/believe. It is sefISH of you to impose your god on others. No one tells you how to worship, so why do you judge others for their religion/faith/not? Our country was founded in large part on freedom of religion including the right to not have one.
You have a lot of support to have kids, too. We don’t have the typical kinds of support that are a luxury you and your wife have. Yet, we get ridiculed for not having children.
More hypocrisy.
It’s one thing when some stranger judges your choices, but it’s a whole other thing when it’s family. What does your scripture say about judging others?
I strive to be more like the one I idolize. I’ll never get there, but I try.
You wanted kids and have them. We are truly happy for you. I’ve even spent hours making blankets for each of your children. Why can’t you just reciprocate happiness instead of hate?
I’m sad that you fill your life with so much dislike and disdain for anyone who isn’t exactly like you. That’s not very god/Jesus of you. Didn’t Jesus love all his children and embrace their differences? I hope you can find a way to be more like those you follow/worship.
As I have asked you numerous times privately and even by Reply All email, please do not (read our blog or) write to us. You went weeks out of your way to reply to this post. So now, I ask you in front of the entire Internet to please stop.
Since you can not agree to disagree, GTFO!
—
Regarding the actual comment itself:
“Its sad when you think of kids as a problem. It shows how selfish someone can be. God said to be fruitful so I plan to. Sorry you feel that way, I will pray for you.”
Grammatically, your insults should read differently:
“It’s sad that you think kids are a problem. It shows how selfish you are. My god said to be fruitful, so I have been. I’m sad you feel the way you do.”
Errors:
* its vs it’s
* when vs that
* “someone” vs. you (You are talking to/about me/us; continue to own the subject of your opinion.)
* “My god” is the case, here. There is not simply one god/religion. To presume that your “God” and any god I might worship are one-in-the-same requires a supposition that I lied about what I do/don’t believe in the original blog post.
* You missed a comma in the compound sentence.
* While you might “plan to” be “more fruitful”, you already have been.
* “I’m sorry” is the proper way to speak to another. Do you let your children get away with “sorry” or do you make them genuinely apologize to one another with sincerity? But since you aren’t “sorry” for how I feel, sad is a proper word choice.
* “I will pray for you” is too personal a comment. Some find it insulting or offensive. That line should be–again, grammatically–stricken from your comment.
* It’s also no longer correct to use double spaces between sentences; the grammar rules changed to a single space a decade ago.
Four sentences; nine errors. Let’s just say it’s not a passing grade.
I could reply with:
“I hate that you are such a self-centered bigot with no regard for the feelings, beliefs, and situations for others.
I believe in being kind to one another, so I tried to tolerate your rants. When that became too much, I politely asked you to stop including me in them; I even asked you to take my address out of your contacts so it would not happen again ‘by accident.’ When you refused, I Replied All to get your attention, but got the attention of your baby brother instead. Now, you seek out a weeks-old comment on our blog and throw insults via this completely public venue? Future communications with you are all blocked for spam and routed to the trash.
Stop spewing your hate at me/us; I will donate time to the human rights causes of my choice in your ‘honor’.”
…but that would be a mean response to your mean comment. No. Wait. Only the first and last sentences are mean. The rest is 100% fact.
your right, I’m not an English major. If people don’t want kids, no problem. I don’t think I said you had too. Anyway, hope you and Uncle E are doing well even if we disagree on things.
As promised, banned from viewing our site.
Clearly, not wanting kids WAS a problem, though. Thus the bother to read/comment in the first place.
We do disagree. The differences are: I can agree-to-disagree, I don’t seek out those who disagree with me to pick a fight, I don’t impose my beliefs on others, etc..
I have a lot of friends who are parents, religious, or otherwise very different from me. We have polite discussions about differences in things we do or believe. We are still friends because we are respectful of each other.