Mother, an O’Brien

That is what she prefers I call her: Mother. It’s how she signs the few cards I receive. What a formality for what is supposed to be an innate bond! Bollocks!

You know one of the stories of when she was cruel to my grandmother. Today, I learned of another one.

Mama Bee saw an “article” in the Paris News about five O’Brien brothers, all WWII vets, who were being honored by their children/grandchildren. Because my grandfather and his four O’Brien brothers also all went to the great war, Mama Bee called my mom (who doesn’t take the small-minded, 20-years-behind, small-town paper) to let her know. She just didn’t want her to be blind-sighted. Should anyone mention it to my mom, Mama Bee wanted her to be clear that it was another O’Brien family that also sent five sons to war.

My mom argued, “I don’t understand” and fought my grandmother on the details…details she had not read and was not willing to read, even online. Instead of buying/borrowing/browsing a paper and reading it for herself, she chose to fight/argue. It was so nasty that my prim-and-proper grandmother hung up on my psychobitch mom. Hell done hath frozen over, y’all. My grandmother has probably never hung up on anyone in her life.

“I’m just sick…”
…and tired!
-Bill Cosby

Seriously, I want the madness to stop. Mom is 60-something years old and is acting ~13. This is beyond ridiculous. She clearly has both physiological (cognition) and psychological (emotional) problems; she needs help. She’s too “always right” to admit she could ever be “wrong”, so she won’t accept help even from one of her oldest friends who is a cousin-by -marriage and anĀ LPC. (Oh, the talks he and I have had!)

If Daddy were here, none of this would be happening.
…and that is the biggest reason I no longer believe in a god. No loving/generous god would take my father (a Saint to many) from this Earth at such a young age. No reasonable god would leave my mother to rot in her own insanity and cruelty. No loving god would leave me in this predicament. I no longer believe in “that which doesn’t kill us makes us stronger”. Instead, I believe “the universe” is simply wearing me down. While a reaction wouldn’t be possible, I won’t be surprised if I die young. After all, I ~always thought I would. I’m kind of surprised it didn’t happen during the 60+MPH hit this past weekend.


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